Must Read

So what on earth has kept me off the blog for so long? Easy to explain. Of course, as usual, it's been insanely busy out here, but there's something else. Something I want to share with you.

I'm sure you've seen at least on of the interviews with President "43" Bush. Personally, I've seen every single one of them. Every one. I knew I had missed him, but I didn't realize how much until he started this book tour.

And that's what I've been doing. Reading his book Decision Points. It's an amazing glimpse into what he was seeing, hearing and debating as he made some of the most important decisions during his Presidency.

It's a fantastic read. Now, I'll step up and admit I am a huge GW fan. Did I agree with everything he said or did while in office? No, I did not. But thanks to this book, I understand why he made so many of the decisions he did.

It's what I term a must read. For everyone. Even if you aren't the fan I am, I have no doubt you'll find it interesting, insightful, enlightening.

I downloaded it to my Kindle, but I'm still buying the hardback version. This is one for my library. This book reflects so much of what has defined me this past decade, defined America.

Read it. Then I'd love to know what you think.

Happy Birthday Marines

The Few, The Proud, The Marines.....God Bless 'Em All!!

I'm So Ashamed

Well, looks like I'm under the weather. And, as usual, looks like I simply do not have TIME to be under the weather.

It's really busy right now....

BUT, that being said, I needed to take a moment and make an official apology. On behalf of this state I live in. I don't now why or how, but California managed to completely blow it - again - during this past election.

Boxer? We reelected Boxer? How the hell that happened......I don't get it.

And Jerry Brown? WTH!?!? I am speechless on that one.

I said earlier that it is possible I could have been a Happy Californian. Well, I sure don't see that happening any time soon - not with election results like that.

I can only imagine how things are gonna be these next few years. And I want to go on the record telling America I'm sorry you'll be stuck digging us out of this mess.

'Cause we all know it's gonna happen. Sooner or later......

Because you need to see this....

I am slammin' busy. But....I need to take a moment and share a couple of pictures with you.

The first is three of my greatest loves - two of my nieces and Baby Blake. I do have to giggle at this one....he looks, so, so, so smushed in this shot.



Look how beautiful my girls are......

This next one is Mama and Baby Blake. His smile just makes me want to weep. I miss them so very much!

Moving On

Any of you that know me, know I have a tendency to name things. Things that I'm attached to, things I interact with regularly. Things a part of my daily life. And I don't just name 'em, tend to become attached to 'em. Homes, vehicles, garmins (I know what you were thinking....shame on you!)

Anyway - I've had to make a tough decision. This week I had a major break-up. Not only did I break-up but I've already moved on.

That's right.....if that makes me fickle then so be it.

See, I've gotten rid of Lee - my garmin. I'm tired of going to those places no lady should be, I'm tired of the misdirection and the mocking sound of his voice. "Recalculating". Enough!!

So I put him aside. And found.....Brian. Brian, is bright (I can see the map without my glasses) and modern (latest technology). Sophisticated and intelligent (constant updates). So far he's taken me to the beach, and downtown - in such a relaxing and timely manner.

I'm very happy.

And while new is good, I'll have to admit that I'm gonna miss my old friend. His voice got me across the country, took me on many interesting rides. But there comes a time when you just have to move on.

Tricks and Treats

I cannot begin to tell you how many people lecture me about finding a balance in my work/life. They have the best of intentions, and they're not 100% wrong.

But they also just do not understand. I'm not hourly. And the amount of responsibility I carry can be overwhelming at times. Especially when dealing with deadlines and such.

I'm not complaining. Not at all. I love my job.

But......in order to make folks happy I have had to learn a few tricks. And to my great surprise, those tricks have turned into real treats for me.

For instance......I'm working from home a lot more. Oh, I still spend around 9-10 hours a day in the office or in the field. But....I'm also working from the apartment much more than I ever thought I would.

In the mornings....I make those difficult phone conversations in the privacy of my home. The walls are very thin in my office and this allows me to say what needs to be said as I need to say it. Plus....I can have a cigarette and pace without the sounds of traffic overwhelming the conversation.

I can also focus much better. I'm working on some detail heavy projects right now and I really need to focus on what I'm doing. Oh, my phone still rings, but I don't have people knocking or interrupting all the time. It's going much faster.

So my "trick" of still working but no one really seeing it has turned into a "treat" of relaxing and being comfortable and a LOT more productive.

To be honest - I'll take this over candy bars and carmel apples any day!

55

I'm learning to cope. Not accept, not excuse but cope.

Since moving to California, I had somehow "acquired" 55lbs. Never in my life did I ever think I would let that happen.

But I did. It's here. And it's lookin' like it doesn't want to "go gently into that dark night".

In other words, it's not coming off easily.

That makes for a few issues trying to be comfortable. Oh, I can still wear my clothes. The one advantage to being tall, is there just so many places for fat to go. But everything is tight. I don't like that. I believe that clothes should be effortless. No mess, no fuss. Pick the outfit out, put it on and forget it.

So I had to go shopping. I bought a couple of big girl pants. Then this weekend I bought a dress, a couple of skirts, shirts and a few jackets.

I will now be a very well dressed and stylish slightly overweight lady.

Huh....yippee. (not)

But - I do feel better. I look better. I'm not fiddling all day, I'm not uncomfortable at all. I can focus on my day rather than my clothes.

Now, please know everything I bought was either on sale (deep discount) so it's easily parted with or can be taken in beautifully.

I always have a plan.

So now that I'm comfortable and able to focus, I'm back on my weight watchers. I have arranged for the time to start working out again, and I'm cautiously optimistic that this may all work.

Meanwhile I'm comfortable. And I am not obsessed with how fat I look. In fact, I rarely think of it. I'm feisty and focused.

Right now, 55 is just a number on a sign on the side of the road.

And a goal. Cause you see......I can't do 55.

Stepping Out

Just wanted to let you know - in case you're actually paying attention over here (lol) that I will not be posting until Monday.

Ya see......my friend is in town.......and I have real live plans........and none of them include a computer!!

But I've still got so much to share so I'll be back on Monday!!

Have a great weekend. I'm planning on it!!!

Brief Note

In case there was any doubt in your mind.....I have 3 goals for this upcoming election.

1) Boxer - OUT

2) Meg Whitman - IN

3) Pelosi - OUT


Oh, there's a lot more I'd *like* to see happen, but if these three pan out?

Yeah......I'll be one happy Californian.**


**something I never EVER dreamed would ever be typed by my fingers.....

I'm starting to see a pattern....

So I had a great weekend last weekend. Seriously. Well, other than having to work Sunday night, but that almost doesn't even register on the "ruin my weekend" scale.

I forgot how much I like to have fun. That's just silly.

This morning I wake up to a the ringing phone. It was a dear friend of mine from Orlando. She's HERE! In Orange County! For 3 whole weeks!!!

Now, she's here for business but she has all of this coming weekend off. And guess what? So do I! Huh.....imagine that.

So, I'll be heading to San Clemente after work on Friday. Saturday will probably be the San Diego Zoo and Sunday? Who knows.....who cares?!?!? We will be together. 2 ladies that have been to hell and back - and a lot of that together.

We have a lot to catch up on, and a lot of memories to rehash. I can hardly wait.

Huh....that will make two pretty great weekends in a row........do you see what I see?

Mama Vi........she still has it!

Wanted to let everyone know that Mama Vi is doing well. She's still just as full of life as ever. She's just a little bored and lonely.

It's hard being so far away. I have to really work to remind myself that I need to call, that she wants to hear what's going on at work. In my life.

I called her Saturday morning from Vegas. She was so mad at me.....seems time had gotten away from me and I hadn't talked to her for about a week. Oops.

So I caught her up on my personnel issues, my travels and my plans. She was amazing.

Full of ideas and suggestions. Words of wisdom and advice. It was a fantastic conversation.

It really brought it home for me. I need to remember that she is the person responsible for who I am today, what I do. I learned this from her! And despite the fact that she may not be a spring chicken anymore, she is still the best resource I have, the strongest support system.

She is.....Mama Vi. One of the most amazing women I've ever met.

Oh - and she said to tell everyone "Hi!"

Livin' The Dream

I love that my employer is now "into" social media. It gives me the freedom to talk about some amazing things we have going on.

And, IMHO, the Pepsi Dream Machine is pretty damned amazing. It's not just about recycling. No....it does a lot more than that.

By utilizing the Pepsi Dream Machine you are not just helping the environment, you're giving our wounded military heroes an opportunity to start a new life. You give them hope. You make their dreams come true.

That's right - a portion of the money made from this process goes to EVB - a program that trains Veterans how to start their own business.

I know not everyone has facebook - but here's the link to their page, in case you do...

And if you don't, or you're too busy to click over, here's an ad from YouTube. Meanwhile - spread the word. Talk about this. It's easy, it's smart, it's a GOOD THING!!!!

I won't kid you - the environmental benefits are a side note to me. Yeah, it's good to recycle. But my main excitement comes from knowing I'm doing SOMETHING for our Veterans.

Let There Be Light

Wow. It's been a while....again, hasn't it? But man oh man oh man has it been eventful. Let me tell you.......

I went up to Chicago and got to sneak in a quick visit with Mama Vi and the family. Cuz even flew up to Chicago and met up with me at the airport. We got that drive back and forth for some quality time that was much needed by both of us. Shopping - with people - cooking, laughing. All very much needed by this weary woman.

Then, not home 2 weeks and I had a quick trip to Palm Springs. It was business but I found a new place I want to run away too. The best part? The quiet. I got to spend a few minutes, sitting on my private balcony, drinking coffee and grabbing a smoke with the sun shining on my face. It was AMAZING.

A couple of huge wins at work then an overnite trip to Vegas to help out Cooking with the Troops at BlogWorld Expo. Spent time with some amazing folks and really started to realize myself. I laughed. I drank. I shared my passion for our Military - and my company as it happens.

I was thrilled to see PepsiCo was a major sponsor for this event. Went over to the booth, talked to the young lady working and let her know how much I'd love to help with this project. Got a few irons in the fire, so we'll see where that leads.

All in all, it's been a pretty great month. And....as if that's not enough, a dear friend will be in Orange County for about 3 weeks so we'll get some quality time together.

So, let's see - time with family, time working and focusing on Soldier's Angels and CWWT, a chance to laugh and enjoy the company of some amazing folks. All Good. All needed so very much.

And it's really made me realize something. I found my passion again. Passion for something other than hitting plan or keeping the trucks on the road. Passion for the stand my employer is making in this world - a passion I can share freely. Passion for our Military and those who support them. My friends and family.....my HEAVENS how I've missed them.

I even made a few connections that will help me do more in this world to fight domestic violence.

Talk about a reawakening.

Long time over due. Long time. I feel alive. I couldn't sleep last night for all I want to say. And Do. And share.

It's amazing. And wonderful. And exciting. I have all these ideas - and really can't wait to share them all with you..........

I think I've finally had a REAL live break thru. And after 21 months of "I hate it here" and another 9 months of "I need a job" I may actually be back to my old self - but this time with new things to say!!!

Celebrate!!!

Wow. What a week I've had. And I had to think last night as I "celebrated" how different life is from a couple of years ago. Back then, I'd have had y'all along every step of the way. Now, as I keep saying, everything is different. I can't Tell All anymore.

But I can sure as hell recap. LOL.

We've had a pretty decent year so far. Overall. Oh, we've struggled to hit plan, and there has been some serious personnel issues. But I had this vision. I knew we'd get thru. The main issue was it wasn't happening as quickly as "They" wanted. Well, that and we'd fix one thing and take our eye off of something simple and basic.

Picture nailing your foot to the wall and trying to move forward. Yeah......I've discovered a new threshold in my ability to deal with frustration.

Anyway - We're now at plan. And kickin' the shit out of that number every single week. Are we doing everything right? No. But again, it's better every day.

So, this week. This week was all about 2011. I had to present my plan for next year to upper management. Now, in this case plan is tactical, not number centric. It's a pretty big deal. And for someone how doesn't like to make empty promises, more than a little nerve wracking. But it's also something I really believe in. Plan your work, work your plan. It's just the whole putting it all down on paper part that unnerves me.

But I did it. And the presentation went better than I ever expected. They asked a lot of questions - and I had answers. Clear, insightful answers. And I had examples of what makes me believe it's not just possible but probable.

And I made it not easy but possible. Something we can actually execute. That's important.

So yesterday I gave myself a bit of a break. Didn't make myself crazy. It was nice. Then I left at 5:00 - another treat - and did a bit of shopping. While I was pickin' up a few things at Target my phone rang. It was one of my favorite people in life calling to tell me that all he'd heard ALL DAY was what a fantastic job I did at my presentation. There's no way I can explain what a huge surprise that was for me. And how important it is in my overall career plan.

But here's the yicky part. My celebration that I treated myself to? Yeah, I called Mama Vi and had a bowl of Lucky Charms. I wanted to go out for a nice dinner, some kick ass drinks and a REAL celebration.

That's the worst part of being out here. When things do go well, when there is something to really celebrate, I'm sorta shit out of luck.

I hate that. I'm so over that I can't even begin to tell you how much I hate it.

But - there's got to be a balance. An up and a down. A ying and a yang.

I just don't like that yang so much.

So we'll just celebrate now. I had a GREAT week. A career making week. A KICK ASS week.

This is a song I just love. Not the happiest of songs, but every damned time I hear it, it puts a smile on my face and gets me moving. So because of that - today I make it my celebration song!

Come on - dance with me........

Real Love

Yesterday was pretty emotional for me. September 11th usually is, but yesterday it was especially so.

9 years later and I'm still mad as hell.

9 years later just a glimpse of the footage evokes tears.

9 years.

Bastards.

I actually had to work a bit yesterday. I had 2 trucks go down on Tuesday so the guys wanted to work Saturday to make up the stops. I had to let them in, so if I'm up at 3:30 might as well stay up. Plus, it's time to commit to plans for next year, so it's not like I didn't have anything to do - for cryin' out loud.......

Today I'll putter. My house is horrible at this point. I don't even want to be here. I need to fix that. Plus, I leave for Chicago in 2 weeks for a bit of training and I'd love everything to be in tip top shape for my return. Hell, I've actually got a lot of traveling in the next month. That quick trip to Chicago, 2 days in Phoenix a few weeks later, then 2 days in Vegas for Blog World, then a week in Indiana with Mama and the family. Yeah, it's time to get things pulled together

Oh, and that baby...that beautiful baby boy who has graced us with his presence. I get to finally hold him. I can't wait. And I'll leave this little update with my new favorite picture in life. It's Blake, sandwiched between his Mama (on the right) and his Aunt Heather on the left. I love this picture. To me it is love defined..........

Shame

September 11, 2001. 9/11

One of the most horrific attacks in American history and absolutely the most tragic event in my lifetime.

And I'm now hearing that the President of these United States isn't going to attend the memorial services in New York.

Not gonna be there. Sending his stand in. Must be something really important on his schedule.

And it damned well better something important. It better be history changing. Because if it's something less than that, it must mean that he doesn't feel that remembering this tragedy, this attack, this moment in our history is not important.

I knew that there would eventually be a shift. That sooner or later we would put this day in the "history books", it would fade in our memory.

But now? Already?! It's not even been 10 years!!! I can still hear the fighter jets flying out of McDill over the Gulf. I can close my eyes and still see my living room, the television. Watch the 1st tower smoke. The 2nd plane hit the other tower. Watch in horror as those towers fell.

I remember the horror of watching the death count grow. Watch in pride as this Nation banded together.

And now? Now our leader is sending a message that it no longer matters. It's not important. Or at least it's not as important as whatever else he plans to do.

Shame on you Obama. Shame Shame SHAME on you.

You insult the victims of this day, their families and loved ones, and this entire nation. Shame on you.

Communicate

In case you hadn't notice - I don't get on here very often. In fact, after this post it may be another couple of weeks. Sorry - It's my life right now.

Anyway - I just found out, by digging thru archives, that Bou's FIL passed away. Weeks ago. Holy Crap. I feel terrible. No call from me. No note. Not a single flower telling her that a person who considers themselves a friend cared at all about her, and her family's loss.

So here is what I'm getting at. Please - if something happens, either contact me via Facebook, that I can ck on a somewhat regular basis or call me. I've actually had the same cell phone number since I've gotten out here. Text me if you're afraid I'll talk your ear off. That's fine. But please, someone let me know.

I really hate that it's gotten to this. I've always been overly concerned with "bothering" people and the time difference between me and the ones I love is huge, but I've got to, GOT to stop this trend. 19 months I've been bitchin' about it, and this is the final straw.

Driven

I take a lot of grief for being such a workaholic.

Sorry. But there are reasons.......

I've always had the tendency. I come by it honestly, Mama Vi instilled in us one hell of a work ethic.

I'm kind of proud of that.

And I knew it would be bad with me coming out here. My other tendency is to work when I'm bored. Or lonely.

Yeah.....I work a lot.

But here's the other thing. Something a lot of folks don't get. My history. My recent history. I've been unemployed twice in the last 5 years. Twice. And not just unemployed but homeless. Homeless and unemployed. Oh, and did I mention I lost a car? Yeah....fun times. Now, it all worked out. And I came out the other side a better person - really. I did. But....it all left scars.

And the scars are what a lot of folks don't see. They don't now about the sleepless nights, the panic when we see "Corporate Announcements". Good heavens, those freak me out! You have no idea....

Anyway - all of that, along with my desire to please and my need to win combines to make Tammi a bit of an overly focused individual.

I'm driven. Driven to win, driven to survive.

And I know I'm not alone.......what drives you?

Checking In!

Well, so much for that whole "blogging daily again" gig. I really HAVE to pick up a laptop. In an effort to really NOT work this labor day I did what I never do and brought home my anchor from the office. The good news is it allows me to throw up a post. The bad news? Yeah....I'm probably going to check my numbers and run a few reports. But at least I'll be doing it in my living room, drinking a good cup of coffee and watchin' something mindless on the T.V.

What's been going on? Well........we've turned the tide at work. Finally. For the 1st half of this year we were not doing so well, numbers wise. I cannot begin to tell you the pressure that puts on a person. Holy Moly. You'd have thought the world was ending.

We had meeting after meeting, recap after recap. All in an effort to get ahead of plan. Funny thing was my strategy? My plan? Yeah. Sell more. Can't really sell more when I'm so focused on being behind. When you're running a race you don't look back, stay focused on where you're going.

I've said all along - 9x1. (that's how we break everything down, period by week) I had a plan. And I knew, no matter what anyone wanted to hear, that was the soonest we could do anything.

Guess what. We hit plan 9x1. And every week after that. Well, actually we blew plan away every week since then.

Plan your work, work your plan. Pretty simple.

Personally? Yeah, well, Army Wife and her hubby were going to come and visit, but that ended up getting pushed out. That was kinda sad.

I was supposed to be in Indiana the 18th of Sept. but that got pushed out. Oh, I have to be in Chicago for training on the 28th of Sept but I delayed my vacation to the end of October.

I'm a great aunt. My oldest niece gave birth to a beautiful baby boy a couple of weeks ago. I cannot wait to get my hands on that angel. It was very hard being so far away for that.

As you can see - a lot of the same ole same ole in Tammi's World. But I'm still here. I'm fine. Hopefully I'll have a little more to say this afternoon. Now - what have y'all been up to?

Lesson in Leadership

Let's talk politics for just a moment, shall we?

I saw this post over at Pete's place, and loved it. My knee jerk reaction was to agree 100%. EVERYONE has a right to let their hair down, vent a bit.

But then I started to really think about it all. And realized it's very similar to some of the crap I'm dealing with right now.

It all boils down to one thing. Everyone bitches. EVERYONE. No one can honestly say they haven't unloaded after a frustrating day or event. We have to. If we don't we'll explode.

But, that being said.....management, leaders as it were, have to be VERY discreet. And I'm discovering you can't even really trust those folks that call themselves your friend.

And you have to be cognisant of what your role is EVERYWHERE you go. Sound old fashioned? Unfair? It is....a little. But it's also decorum. The right way.

When you work for a major organization, public or private, people watch you. They listen to you. And if you take that position of leadership and don't believe that, well......you'll learn sooner rather than later.

For me? I'm probably a little paranoid about all that. I never go to the grocery store lookin' less then pulled together. No tshirts, the very basics of make-up, and I always strive to be pleasant. (Strive being the operative word here).

And when it comes to venting, well my friends outside of work get the brunt of that. And Cuz. Cuz hears everything.

Now, I'll admit, that's not how it's always been. In the beginning I did vent with my peers. But found out quickly that gets turned back on you muy rápidamente. So now I vent outside of the organization.

What happened with General McChrystal's staff is similar to that, and I love the way Pete lays it out. But I do have to raise my hand on one thing. They vented in front of a reporter. Ummmm, not to be disrespectful, but that's just a little, well, dumb.

That would be like me, sitting in my office with the door open (the office located next to my boss btw) and loudly going off. You know damned well it's gonna be heard.

And there will be consequences.

So I don't do that. I don't even vent on the phone inside. I walk out to the parking lot if I'm fixin' to explode. And you shouldn't be surprised to hear I've logged a lot of miles in that parking lot these past 18 months.

But let's boil it all down. I hate all this brouhaha that's gone on this past week. It's distracting when we have a very important mission going on. When lives are at stake. And because change is so stressful, so unsettling, it's the VERY last thing we need our military to be dealing with.

Leaders are leaders - on the job and off. Are we perfect? No...no we are not. But we do need to realize that and accept the fact that we are held to higher standards.

Now, if we could just get that President of ours to understand that - not to mention his wife - things might eventually calm down and we can deal with the things we need to deal with.

Southern Love

This past week was really a nightmare. Really. It was.

As usual I can't go into details, but I will sum it up with one phrase. "Liars never prosper".

Oh, they can cause a huge mess, ruin a lot of lives, but they never prosper.

Anyway - one of my guys had gone on vacation and was back on Thursday. His destination? Orlando. To say I was jealous is putting it mildly.

We got a chance to chat about his family adventure and I'm happy to say he now has a bit of understanding on why I love that state so much. He didn't see what I consider the meat and potatoes of it all, never made it to the Gulf Coast, but even his kids saw how beautiful that state can be.

As we chatted and I answered some of his "why do they" questions, I really REALLY started to get homesick. That night was a night full of remembering.

And it was not just of Florida - it was of all things southern. See, living down there I spent a lot of time traveling the south. And, ohhhh I do love the south.

Sweet tea & cornbread. Hi Y'all, and smiles for strangers. I love the heat, and yes - even the humidity. It has it's pitfalls, I'm not that starstruck. But I'll tell you what - I'll take hurricanes over earthquakes any day.

Ahhh The South. I miss it more than I realized.

And this Sunday morning, here is one of my all time favorite songs. Southern Rock at it's best......it takes me back to college and cruisin'. And it carried me through to boating and beachin' a few years later.

Timeless. And never fails to make me tap my toes and smile.

Fresh Start

Wow...it's been insane. And.....like I've always said - when things get tough, the tough cut their hair.

Before:



After:





Fresh and new.....I'll take that today. It's the little things.

How frustrating!

I sit here laughing, with my mind racing and my fingers hovering over the keys. Oh, I have so much to tell you. To talk about. Advice so you don't have to deal with some of the stuff I deal with daily.

But I can't. I can't talk about any of it.

I want to, but I can't.

And I've been sooooo missing my blog. I've actually craved the opportunity to write and share.

And I can't.

It's a side effect of the job.

Man, life was much easier when I was just a sales rep.

Anyway - I'm pretty sure I'll have some stories tonite and tomorrow. Stories I can share. I'm going out to a store and doing a demo today. Face to face interaction. It's packed full of blogging opportunities.

That should help a bit. But meanwhile, ohhhhhh I wish I could tell you whats going on. You just flat out wouldn't believe it.

Enough is Enough

Mondays. They have not gotten any better over the past few months, let me tell you.

I actually hyperventilate most Sunday evenings. Around 7:00 my mind jumps to what I have to accomplish the next week. As it skims through each day it ends zeroing in on Monday.

That happens on a regular basis.

Reports to be run. Numbers to explain. Meetings to report in, interviews to conduct. Projects to coordinate, and people to motivate.

Some days it's just too much.

This morning is the result of one of those days. Couldn't sleep last night. Would wake myself up with mini anxiety attacks dreaming about what needs to be done.

Now, before you tell me about having a pad of paper by the bed, I've done that. Heck, I had a recorder I used to use. Worked great, because I didn't need to find my glasses. But that's not it....it's not that I'll forget to do something or that I had a breakthrough on an idea.

No, it's the sheer volume of stuff that needs to be accomplished.

I've tried having a class of wine or a drink to relax. Gotta tell you, unless I just drink myself to sleep, that's not helping either.

It's the nature of the beast. It comes from caring TOO much. I realize that. I need to step away a bit. Just a bit - a manager that doesn't care doesn't need to be a manager. At least that's my take on it.

So it's Monday morning. 6:30am. I'm still at home in my jammies, sipping on some excellent coffee and trying to prod myself into the shower. Simply put - I don't wanna go in. I just don't. Oh, I will. But I don't want to.

I think I need a vacation. There's a 3 day weekend coming up and I do believe I'm going to find some way to take ALL 3 days off. And by off, I mean OFF. No report running, no checking emails, no nothing. Hell, I may not even have any juice that day.

Because sometimes? Sometimes enough is enough.

Some things WON'T Change

I love this country. I admire our Military - men, women and their families who freely give for our freedom.

That won't change.

And I get emotional about it. I am watching a rerun right now of Extreme Makeover that is centered around rebuilding a home for a soldier injured in Iraq. My eyes are watering constantly.

Just now I popped over to Mike the Marine's site and found a video that took me from watery eyes to down right bawling.

Watch it.

The Star Spangled banner will ALWAYS move me.

That won't change either.

Thanks for sharing Mike.

Still Waiting

As you may remember, I had actually paid someone to start the search for my birth mother.

We started out strong. They were encouraged by the amount of information I had. I was encouraged by their enthusiasm.

It's now been a few months.

I gotta tell you, I'm starting to get worried that despite my caution in who I hired, I may have been taken. I haven't had so much as an email in over a month. Nothing. Nada.

This is one time that silence is not golden.

I am not happy. I'm going to try getting ahold of them again this week. I'll call and email and see what kind of response I get.

If I get nothing? Well, then I'll be posting all of the pertinent information just so YOU know who NOT to do business with.

$800 is not chump change. And I'm beginning to feel a bit like a chump.

Behind the Story

When I was trying to get this place set up yesterday, the hardest part was coming up with a name.

I'm not a Road Warrior anymore, and Tammi's World was taken. I had several other ideas, but they were suited to my life NOW, and I wanted a name that could stick. Something that would stand up to more moves and changes.

No, there's nothing in the works, but come-on. It's MY life! We all know how that works.

Anyway - I had this GREAT idea....Tammi's Trials. PERFECT. Life is often a trial, and the secret to succeeding is how you handle them. I like to think I do alright.....when push comes to shove.

Tammi's Trials it is!!

Until I actually read what I had typed and registered. Tammi's TRAIL?!?! WTF?!?!?!

Damn.....well, ok. That works too.

It's my trail. The path I am on. Where it leads? Who knows. It's all just one big journey.

So that's the story of the new blog name.

Tammi's Trail.

Come on.....let's take this one together.

Data Gathering.......for fun

I'm trying so hard to get my sidebar updated with my favorite places. But....I'm at work, and there's that whole "I should be working" thought. Plus, I'm lazy. I had everything bookmarked. So I'm having to hunt.

Not trying to be a comment whore, but if you don't see your name on the sidebar, PLEASE leave a comment so I can add you in.

It's looking more and more like I'll be treating myself to a new laptop for home for my birthday. Until then? I'll hit it when I can.

*actually, I think that may have been my theme in life in my younger years......

Starting Over.......again

Wow. It seems that the theme of my life anymore is "Starting Over". Moving nonstop and after heaven only knows how many blogs, it seems I'm doin' it one more time.

My domain ran out and I didn't even realize it. So....bye bye Tammi's World. My bad. What I really hate is all that was lost. 6 years of my life recorded. Pictures that I have no way to recover.

Lesson Learned.

Again.

So, putting all that behind me, I'll start over again. Can't promise excitement, but I can promise a glimpse inside. Inside my life, my mind and the trials of being a single woman, in a strange place, alone, taking on the most challenging job I've ever had.

If nothin' else, it'll be interesting.........